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Random Quote

"Was bitten on the cheek by a spider. Do not appear to be able to climb walls or have any kind of extrasensory abilities yet. So far I've just got a spider bite on my cheek. Seems deeply unfair, really."

Neil Gaiman 
T.M.R'S WORKSTATION :: QUOTES 

Since the site has that random quote feature at the bottom of the menu and the "database" of quotes is getting rather lengthy now, using up around 135K of space on the server and containing a total of 924 quotes here's a chance to see eight of them at once, selected totally at random (so yes, that does mean that the same quote will sometimes appear more than once but it's not a bug... honest!) for your reading pleasure. Reload the page if you'd like some more where these came from and please note that some of these quotes are of an adult nature and the more sensitive amongst you may want to look away now!

"Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television."

Woody Allen 

"It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens."

Woody Allen 

"As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality."

Albert Einstein 

"I'm not so good on gonorrhea but I'm very sound on syphilis."

Liza Picard 

"You're not thick. You've got GCSEs. Admittedly only in Home Economics and P.E. but you know, one day somebody might want someone who can bake and do sit-ups at the same time."

Jonny Keogh 

"I'm slowly becoming a convert to the principle that you can't motivate people to do things, you can only demotivate them. The primary job of the manager is not to empower but to remove obstacles."

Scott Adams 

"My favourite moment from being a guide leader was when one 14 year old with an evil sense of humour told a very fashion-conscious 12 year old girl that 'mindlessly following fashion trends is *so* 2000.' Fortunatly I managed to get out of the room before bursting out laughing."

Claire Bickell 

"This isn't life in the fast lane, it's life in the oncoming traffic."

Terry Pratchett 
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